Dwarves of Dragon Mountain also called THE Dwarves of Dragon Mountain, Dragon Mountain, or The Dwarves of Demrel (Jesus, would you pick a name and stick with it?!), has a setting that sizzles with potential. It revolves around three dwarven miners trapped in a massive mine underneath a mountain after a cave-in. They have to find a way out before they die of thirst, starvation, exhaustion, the mysterious creatures residing in the darkness who probably want to eat them, or a mixture of all four. It’s like The Descent, but replace the ladies with the dwarves. If you’re at all familiar with the fantasy genre, then you’ve probably seen an innumerable amount of dwarf interpretations, and they all probably include mining or drinking in some capacity. The concept of living through a disaster with limited supplies on hand may also be familiar to you if you watch enough survival adventure movies like Alive or 127 Hours.
At this point, we’re all pretty much sick of these tropes, but Dwarves of Dragon Mountain makes a good first impression by taking these two not-so-original aspects and melding them together into a setting that’s altogether new yet familiar. Dwarves are usually at home in a mine, after all. What if something went wrong, and they had to fight for survival in a place that isn’t typically that dangerous for them? It’s such an obvious yet clever concept, and it’s a wonder nobody has thought up a story hook like this before. If only the movie’s amateurism didn’t overshadow its admirable qualities, then we could have had something special here.
The acting was way better than what I would have expected from an independent fantasy/steampunk production. The three dwarves aren’t played by any big names, but if you check their IMDb pages, then you’ll see that they all have a solid amount of acting experience in television, movies, and video games. And that experience is evident, as they do a pretty good job of making their respective characters feel like tangible people. Odryn (Brent Bateman) is the amiable family man (family dwarf?) who has the most to lose if he dies in the mine, Brenn (Robert Morgan) is cynical, quick to anger, and the most emotionally affected by the cave-in, and Calcas (John Hutton) is the most experienced and secretive of the group. Everybody feels like a unique character who has something to contribute. And since the whole movie takes place in a dark mine, it’s up to the characters to give the audience a general idea of what their world is like outside and dispensing exposition about how they came to work at this specific location.
(Cue Charlie’s Angels Theme)
As the story progresses and we learn a little more about their experiences in the outside world, we slowly understand how they think and why. However, the overall plot doesn’t support the the decently written characters, as it’s a fairly aimless affair that feels like it’s on autopilot for most of the time (Talking scene, followed by trekking montage, then an action beat. Rinse and repeat until the movie ends with an unenthusiastic shrug). But as far as protagonists go, there are worse people I could think of to be stuck with for an hour and a half. Like Pauly Shore or something. Oh god, could you imagine being stuck with Pauly Shore in a. caved-in mine? That’s more horrifying than the blind cave-dwelling monsters that hunt through sound.
Biodome 2: What’s MINE is yours!
The segues into the characters’ backstories don’t always feel one hundred percent natural, but I was invested enough in their plight to let it go and hear them talk. I was interested at first, anyway. Then as the movie kept letting them talk, I realized that the sound and audio mixing for this movie is not that good. Outside of the stock sound effects that pop up from time to time, there’s a consistent voice and background audio problem. Whenever characters speak to each other, their voices become notably loud enough to drown out the ambient noise of the background, and then when they stop talking, it sharply cuts back to normal. It’s like listening to a lousy Discord call where everybody has a crappy mic from Walmart. I wanted to be invested in the characters stories and the actors telling them, but that sound issue was VERY distracting. I know it’s an independent film, so I wasn’t expecting THX levels of audio quality, but this is a rookie filmmaking mistake that could have been easily fixed in post, so I have no idea why that didn’t happen.
I liked the subterranean setting and the bleak tone the film gave off. The caves are pitch dark and seemingly endless, with the only thing staving off the hopelessness and despair is the dim light from the dwarves’ lamps, matches, and giant steampunk-ish lightbulb they carry around on a cart, all of which won’t last forever. There’s some decent camerawork at play here, showing us the deep, dark innards of the mine that holds little to no light, but with the light that’s available in the hands of the dwarves, we’re able to see just enough to get an inkling of the size of the space. And even then, that inkling has room for some uncertainty. Of course, the fact that it’s hard to see anything is an often used filmmaking trick to make us think it’s more extensive and impressive than it is. The same can be said for the monsters, which are never seen in full view, most likely because they look like ass. It’s a good trick for independent productions.
Hello?! Plot? Are you down there?!
The look of the film gets stale after a while, though, since the cinematography generally sticks to basic medium shots. It feels oddly streamlined for something that’s supposed to be a steampunk/fantasy adventure. They’re not bad shots by any means, but some variation in the cinematography would have gone a long way. I suppose the excuse could be that since the whole movie takes place in a cave, the filmmakers were restricted in the kind of shots they could take, but I don’t buy that. The film I mentioned, The Descent, had an underground setting like Dwarves of Dragon Mountain, and its cinematography was exceedingly varied and creative in its execution. Sure, it had more money attached to it, but a bigger budget doesn’t necessarily correlate with imaginative camerawork, so I was a bit disappointed that Dragon Mountain didn’t try to go down a similar route.
AND BY THE WAY, I was under the impression there would be a fire-breathing dragon in this film. “What made you think that?” I hear you ask. Oh, I don’t know, the title for one thing, and OH YEAH, THE POSTER WITH THE BIGASS DRAGON ON IT.
FRAUDULENCE! FRAUDULENCE AND LIES, I SAY!
Yeah, despite taking up SEVENTY FREAKIN’ PERCENT of the poster, the dragon isn’t a factor in the story whatsoever. (There’s even two more in the distance, the liars!) The only time it ever shows up is for thirty seconds in the beginning as it flies over the mountain, and we never see it again. Why even put the dragon (a crappy-looking one at that) in the movie in the first place? At best, the money put into the dragon was a wasted asset that could have gone somewhere else. At worst, it’s clear and obvious bait to lure fantasy nerds in because the filmmakers weren’t confident that it would have a large enough appeal on its own merits. It didn’t help them in the long run because I’d have to scour the earth for twenty years to find a single soul who has seen this thing. The only reason I know about it is because I accidentally stumbled upon it while scrolling on Amazon Prime. It didn’t show up right away either. I was exploring the deepest darkest rungs of Amazon Prime’s catalog. I had a lantern, provisions, found etchings on the walls left by long-dead civilizations, and I got lost a couple times. It was a more perilous journey than the one that the dwarves experienced in this movie! I almost died!
Journal log, Day 47: After wandering through Amazon Prime’s dark and cavernous colon for over a month, I’ve stumbled upon something! Stashed between Vibes starring Jeff Goldblum and at least three Uwe Boll movies is an independent fantasy film known as Dwarves of Dragon Mountain! I shall take the fantasy film and study it. The rest I will leave where they are. May the the tides of time wash them away, never to be found again.
I wanted Dwarves of Dragon Mountain to be good. I love the overall concept, but I wish there were a more robust vision behind it. The main characters were decently written and performed, but its story never gains any real traction as it goes along, the cinematography is adequate yet uninspired, and the audio feels like an intern mixed it. As is, I’ve seen a lot better done with a lot less. I don’t want this movie to discourage people from fiddling with the overall concept, though! As I said, it’s rife with possibility. It could even be the forerunner of a new fantasy/horror/survival subgenre! Maybe this kind of story will thrive better in a book, video game, or perhaps a roleplaying game? There have been indie games like Dwarf Fortress or Deep Rock Galactic that have similar settings. If somebody made a product that taps into the full potential of this subgenre, I believe it could go far! The movie’s a dud, but that doesn’t mean the idea is.
I promised myself I wouldn’t make this hack joke WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE?!
The Bard of the Reel 